Have Faith …

This isn’t a post about a specific religion or the need for a higher power – so please breath a sigh of relief. No, this post is actually about … well .. fog.

I live in Kelowna (in beautiful British Columbia) and the fastest way to get to or from Vancouver is by using a main highway and then a connector highway. The connector highway has lots of pockets where the fog sets in during the fall and winter months. I don’t believe I have ever experienced anything as terrifying as hitting one of those pockets in the pitch black night … you are usually pretty tired as it is the last leg before you reach home and not seeing where you are going is both exhausting and terrifying.

There is also something about the fog that is disorientating. Despite having travelled the road before in the dark and felt completely competent, not being able to see further than a few feet in front of you disorients you and makes it impossible to foresee what is up ahead.

The only thing I remember from my driver’s training is that putting high beams on in fog is the WORST thing a person can do (something to do with the high beams bouncing back and blinding the driver). So you are stuck with your low beams showing you a few feet ahead of you in the pea soup like fog.

What I do know is that when you hit that pocket of fog, the only thing you can do is keep moving (despite the overwhelming urge to JUST STOP). And have faith that – as long as you drive appropriately, follow the road markings and keep moving forward – you will get out of the pocket. You can’t look ahead, you can’t plan, you don’t actually even know if anyone is coming up behind you until they are right on your tail. So … you dig deep, follow the road signs, drive at an appropriate pace … and have faith.

I guess this is a bit about believing in a universal benevolence because part of my faith during those times is that the universe doesn’t want something bad to happen to me or my fellow travelers. That, as long as I do what I need to do, the universe will keep us safe.

A relationship transformation, much like driving the connector, has pockets of fog that are disorienting. Where things hit you unexpectedly, it is normal to want to put the breaks on and stop progress – by acting out, ordering your lawyer to do something litigious or by just plan ignoring everyone’s requests for you to participate.

I have seen it a lot in the last stages of hammering out a deal or in the final stages of litigation. The main things are resolved, there is a general road map set out and then something comes out of the blue. Either someone does something that the other party doesn’t agree with or understand or an issue is raised that was never considered before. Suddenly it feels like being on that connecter at the end of the long drive and hitting a nasty patch of fog.

There is an urge sometimes at that stage to demand answers, to force action and to take steps that you know aren’t in your best interest – but if you can have just a little bit of faith … and do what you know is right … you will come out of the fog. All of the work that you have put into reaching a resolution will come to fruition and things will resolved and often the results are even better than you expected

I guess the universe really does have our backs.